Prayer

• That I don’t really belong at Seekers
• That I wouldn’t know how to preach
• That I’m not good enough, and
• That I don’t have a spiritual contribution to make.

Another thing it told me was that my spiritual experience at Seekers, and maybe even some of the kinds of contributions I have to make at Seekers, are deeply shaped by my involvement in the self-help fellowship that I mentioned.

So today is a fitting day for my first sermon at Seekers.  It is the 22nd anniversary of the day I went to my first self-help meeting and also the 22nd anniversary of my first 24 hours without a drink.  I have been blessed, through the grace of God, with the gift of not ever having taken a single drink since that day.

A few weeks after I had the dream about preaching, I dreamed I was walking through a park and stepped off what I thought was a step but really was a concrete edge to that level of the park -- the next level was far below.  It was as if I had stepped out a 5th floor window.  The image I have in mind is a Tarot card: the Fool.  A young traveler, dressed like a jester, carries his small pack on the end of a stick slung across his shoulder.  With his dog at his heels, he is about to step off a cliff.  It’s the card that signifies the beginning of a spiritual journey, which is risky and requires a certain degree of abandon as well as faith and hope.

Just as I stepped off the edge of the park, I realized it was’t just a step, but rather a sheer precipice.  It was sort of like the cartoon characters who hang in the air for a minute before they crash to the ground.  In that brief pause, I prayed passionately.  I asked God to protect me and keep me from landing too hard.  I began to notice that I was descending very slowly, much slower than made sense, given the force of gravity.  I also noticed that little gusts of wind were blowing upward, slowing my fall.  God was slowing my descent.  I kept praying and began planning my landing—I would stay loose and relaxed, especially in the ankles and knees, and start rolling when I hit the ground.  But when I landed, I landed softly on my feet, just as if I had stepped down a step rather than fallen off a cliff.  To me, the message of this dream was, “Preach about prayer.”

After that dream, I went to the course on preaching that Celebration Circle gave to see if I could learn something about how to preach.  I asked people if there was some kind of a protocol or format for a sermon.  They all laughed and said no.  Then someone said that there is a formula but people in Seekers frown on it because it is so hackneyed.  It is 3 points and 2 jokes.  I liked that.  I like structure.  So here’s my first joke.   After that, see if you can find the 3 points:

Reverend Billy Graham tells of a time early in his ministry when he arrived in a small town to preach a sermon. Wanting to mail a letter, he asked a young boy where the post office was. When the boy had told him, Dr. Graham thanked him and said, "If you'll come to the Baptist Church this evening, you can hear me telling everyone how to get to heaven."
The boy replied, "I don't think I'll be there... You don't even know your way to the post office."

I’m going to preach today about prayer, but remember this: I barely know how to find my way to the post office.

My prayer life is very influenced by what I have learned in my recovery group.  One of the most important tools this self-help group offers to people with drinking problems is training in how to pray.  One kind of prayer that is emphasized is “praying only for a knowledge of God’s will and the power to carry it out.”  This kind of prayer involves surrender of self and acceptance of God’s will for us.  It takes the focus off what we want or need, which was the problem for us in the first place, and puts our focus outside ourselves.  Instead of waiting for what we want to materialize, we keep an open mind about how God might answer our prayer, since it’s his will we are trying to discern. That’s the challenge, I think, not praying, but recognizing when our prayers are answered.  My second joke illustrates this problem.

A dissolute man is desperately trying to find a parking space.  He prays to God, fervently, promising that he’ll give up all of his bad habits: drinking, smoking, gambling, promiscuous sex, etc., if he can just get a parking place. At that very moment a space appears. He immediately calls up to God: "Never mind, God, I've found one."

Like the dissolute man, we often fail to make the connection between prayer and the answers we receive.

Early studies of brain activity using EEGs showed that prayer and meditation  change brain wave activity to produce the kinds of brain waves that are associated with calmness, focus, and creativity.  These are all states of mind that help us arrive at solutions to problems.

More advanced electronic imaging techniques have shown that prayer  also affects the location of brain activity.  The front part of the brain, which is usually involved in focusing attention and concentration, is more active during prayer and meditation, but there is greatly decreased activity in the parietal lobe.  The parietal area of the brain is responsible for giving us a sense of our orientation in space and time.   That accounts for the sense of spaciousness or oneness with all creation that can sometimes be experienced during times of focused prayer or mediation.  It also explains how prayer can bring us in touch with our “higher self,” since the frontal part of the brain is responsible for the higher mental functions.  And it also explains how prayer can free us from our bondage to self and make us less preoccupied with our lower or selfish desires, allowing us to see more options.

Prayer also increases the production of serotonin, which decrease depression and anxiety, increasing our flexibility and making it easier for us to see things in a new way.  And it also increases melatonin, which promotes good sleep and boosts the immune system, giving us more health and vigor.

Prayer is comforting and opens our minds to new solutions.  Those new perceptions or solutions are an answer to our prayer.

I have learned something else about prayer in Seekers.  I grew up an Episcopalian.  We didn’t talk to Jesus much.  It has always been easy for me to talk to God, who, to me, is kind of abstract and impersonal. But once in Mission Group, when we were talking about what we do when we are stressed or overwhelmed, Marjory said, “I talk to Jesus.”

I found that an interesting idea but couldn’t imagine how I would talk to the lamb of God, meek and mild, white-robed, so virtuous that he would give his life to save the world.  But I wanted to get a better idea of what it would be like to talk to Jesus.  Marjory suggested I read the book of Mark, which I did.  I also read Borg’s book, Meeting Jesus Again for the First Time.

Was I surprised!  Anna Gilcher has preached about Jesus’ fundamental wildness.  I didn’t really know what she meant at the time, but I think I do now.

The first time I went swimming in the ocean I went right into the water and was delighted at how much fun it was to float along on the waves.  I was bouncing along with the waves, feeling the water against my body and the warm sun on my face, when I suddenly I was hit by an enormous wall of water that turned me upside down, pressing my face against the rocks and sand at the bottom of the sea and dragging me along under water until I thought I was going to drown.  I felt as if the ocean had turned against me, but it wasn’t really anything against me personally.  It was just something natural that happened that I had no control over.  Finally the ocean loosened its hold and I was able to float with my head above water, very grateful to be alive and with a new understanding of the word powerful.  Talking to Jesus is sort of like that for me—not safe but definitely powerful.

Here’s how Jesus comes across to me when I talk to him.

First of all, he is not meek and mild at all-- he is strong and sweaty, wiry and bristly, and somewhat tense.

• He is completely unpredictable.  Just when I think I have him pinned down,  he comes out with something totally unexpected.
• He is a truth-teller and is not deceived by appearances
• He has little respect for earthly authority
• He has a flawless sense of priorities: he knows exactly what to hold on to and what to let go of
• He is powerfully authentic
• He is compassionate but not a victim of what the Buddhists call idiot compassion—not an enabler.
• He practices and advocates innocence and open-mindedness, or what the Buddhists call beginner’s mind
• He accepts God’s will with complete surrender regardless of what it means to him personally.  He surrenders to God’s wildness.
• He will do whatever he has to do to get God’s message across—he uses his gifts to lead people to God but never just to show off
• He is not a people pleaser
• He loves me for my authentic self without any pretense on my part

So this  is the end of my sermon on prayer.  To summarize what I thought my three points were (though I know you may have gotten entirely different ones out of this), they were:

PRAYER CAN SOFTEN THE FALL
PRAYER HELPS US FIND ANSWERS
JESUS IS A GNARLY DUDE