In The Shade Of A Daisy

Welcome to Foundry Gallery. I had a dream about this talk where I was with a group of students in their 30s who were saying how hard it was to hang in with the process of being artists. "Tell me about it" I said. "I am 73."

What has encouraged me to stay with making paintings. It is the desire to express myself and to communicate. Two years ago this desire necessitated a change in style. I usually paint in an abstract manner [show Santa Fe Drums]. I choreograph line, color and energy to create a world where the viewer can wander and make up their own story and images.

Since I decided I wanted to do a series on my faith journey I decided to use images instead of abstract work. Actually it was triggered by the fact that Daisy Alert arrived uninvited two years ago when I was painting my last show. It was so different I took it as a message I was to change my style. Some of you saw this at my last talk two years ago.

My life was and is full of changes. Hollis' health was changing in a way that impacted on our relationship and my self image. Our church, 70 people, was going to have to move from their house on embassy row to a new place. This was calling for a way for the church to work with the creative process as a group. I was, and am, fascinated with the creative process. It is a combination of making decisions and choices and then trusting for some information or ideas to be given. The product may not be what we expected. This involves humility to accept the result. I am calling this the faith journey.

The faith journey involves trust...trust of self and other. As I thought about Daisy Alert it seemed like a wake up call. The stems seem like snakes to me reaching into the viewer space. I decided to use the daisy as my emblem for the faith journey. As a child I used to play ball on a field of weeds that included daisies. Even though we walked on the daisies they would come back up because the stems were wiry. They were tough and yet they were flowers and perishable. The daisy seemed to represent courage to me. I decided to use it in a narrative way and do a story about my own faith.

I felt a lot of fear about Hollis' health. I wanted answers about what life would be like for us 5 years from now. The answer I got was that I could not cross bridges until I got to them and I had to wait. I had to trust that I would be given daily bread. I did not trust. This is a very destructive place to be not to trust.

This resulted in this bound figure which I named Lazarus. Where are the daisies I asked. I decided to add them the way Egyptians added items for the journey in the after life.

The other image which kept coming to me was Jesus walking on water. I felt in trusting God when I didn't know for sure I was walking on water.

The fourth idea was Jacob's Ladder. This is an Old Testament story where Jacob actually has direct contact with God in a dream. This title Jacob's Ladder was given but I had to figure out where to go with it. I went to the library and looked at children's books to find illustrations. They were full of angels running up and down the ladder. I knew I did not want that. I knew I wanted a daisy and a ladder so I combined them arbitrarily. This image seems like a logo to me.

As I painted these pictures I kept asking self what the title of the show should be. Daisy as logo, daisy as emblem, daisy as metaphor? Finally the title "In the Shade of a Daisy " was given. This seemed to reflect my desire to talk about God in my life where we are given insights or awarenesses of God's presence but it is always site specific. In a way it does not stay with us and thus the phrase "daily bread" is so true.

I have used the phrase "it was given". When we create things ... ideas, colors, people are given but then we have to make decisions how to respond and incorporate these in our lives. It is this balance of receiving and creating which fascinates me. I always feel I am sitting in the God seat when I create but I have to get off and be humble when I accept what I have done. It rarely meets my expectations.

In the case of this show I became very anxious when I was finished. I showed my artist friends photographs of the images and asked their help in arranging them in a logical manner. They struggled and I struggled. Then I had a dream that explained what was going on. I was refusing to accept what I had done. I had hoped to create a logical sequence of faith steps. It is not logical. I had not discovered the answer of how God works in our lives by doing this. I was reminded of when I was 35 years old and trying to figure out my religion by reading theology. I read and read and read and finally had to give up. Somehow I became aware that to discover my faith I had to live as if I had it and then it would be given. I needed to find fellow travelers. I have been fortunate to have found them in my small church which encourages people to be visible in their risks and in their faith journey. I suspect I would not be painting today if it were not for the encouragement to take myself seriously that I get from this group.

Also the support I get in the artist cooperative has been important. Here we can put up what we want in this gallery. We have different ideas what we want from our art. And it is OK to be different. Daisy" and grew out of a painting workshop I took in West Virginia in 1975. I had just married Hollis and could quit my job to do art full time. A real privilege. Hollis has been very supportive of my doing my art and I feel blessed.

I think this choice of subject grew out of the fact 1975 was a very hopeful upbeat time for me. I have found when I get to a stuck place in my life if I go back and get in touch with a happy and hopeful time something seems to change in my outlook and I can find the creative solutions. I liked the feeling of a bug's eye view of the daisies making them taller than the mountains.

This image seems to be a favorite with the sense of abundance in it.

I have arranged the chairs in a circle in the hope that some of you can share your faith journey stories or comment on what is triggered in you by these images.

[Seekers] [Write us] [Artist Mission Group]